"If love is the answer, could you rephrase the question?" ~Lily Tomlin

Have you never seen the movies? When a guy and a girl get together to study, they rarely study. At least, that was the case for Devon and Keala... You may be asking, doesn't Devon have a girlfriend? Yes. Yes he does. And it didn't begin as a romantic encounter...

Keala sat, brows forrowed, staring at the coffee table. Sheets of paper were spread across the room with letters and symbols and numbers intermixed.

"What the hell is this extra 9y squared?? Agh! Just sell it! Go away!"

"Did you consider the prime factor has three terms?"
"Yes. I don't know. The nine y just ruins the whole thing!"

Juicy. Summer calculus homework. To tell the truth, nothing romantic happened then. It was as the two were sitting on the porch after hours of head-numbing calculations that Dev leaned in and kissed Keala. Woah! He said good bye and walked home, waving of course. And she sat there, cheeks magenta, and smiled. Ahhh, young love. Well, you know, except for poor Lorettia. Word on the street? She was dumped.

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It's true- Lorettia and Dev are offically through. Lorettia's reaction? She's pissed. Really steaming mad. As the story goes, Lorettia visited a nearby bar. Witnesses say tears were streaming down her face and she was wearing sweat pants and a ripped UofO tee. Perched atoop a barstool she ordered a Cosmo. As it happens, she didn't have one sip of her drink. Something had caught her eye. That something was tall, lean, and attractive with light brown hair and a winning smile. As fate would have it, this mystery man plopped down right next to Lorettia.

"And who might you be?" Lorettia questioned, batting her eyelids.

"I'm Berke. Pleased to meet you.."

"Lorettia."

"Lorettia. What a pretty name. It's unique."

"Are you hitting me?"

"Um, no, my apologizies. See I'm blindly in love for a girl who doesn't love me."

"Oh. Yeah, that's pretty much the story of my life. Except not, you know, with a girl. Not that I don't, uh, support that but I just meant-"

"It's cool. I get it."

"He just dumped me. For some chick named Keala. Jesus Christ."

"Superstar. Haha. Wait, did you say Keala?"

"Yeah. my boyfriend Dev just left for some younger indian friend of his! Keala!"

"She's the..."

"OMG you can't be serious. You're in love with that Keala?!" Berke nodded.

"Man. You must be hurting too. Want to head over to my place? Grab a real drink?"

"Yeah... Yeah, sure, I'd love to."

You get the idea XD

And so a realationship was born out of revenge and jelousy. Will both of the new love birds find what they're looking for? Or is someone bound to get their heart trampled on? Only time will tell.

"Forget love, I'd rather fall in chocolate" ~Sandra Dykes

Bursts of orange color flashed in the window as Hunter and Dani... were together. Within a few minutes a thick smoke filled the damp Oregon air.

"What the hell is going on?" Dani wondered. She stopped to look out the apartment window. What she saw was a building on fire, with flames hungrily engulfing the rest of the neighboring complex. She unlocked the window and soon screams of children came pouring in.

"Hunter, we have to do something! There's no firemen! We need to help; call the police!"

"Hold on babe, I gotta take a dump."

"What?!"

"I gotta poo. Maybe later."

"Ya know, I'm sick of all your shit. It seems like the only way to get rid of all your crap is to lock you in the bathroom. You're bowel movements aren't the only thing that need to go. I'm outta here."

"Are you breaking up with me?"

"Consider yourself dumped."

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Break-ups are sad, but Andy didn't seem particularly bothered when she heard the news. In fact, Hunter didn't seem as devasted as most after a long relationship. He ended up texting the whole night away with Andy. Hmmm... no comment.

Oh by the way, its human nature for people to develop feelings for other people. On that note, Erika has officially moved on to Burt. And Jay likes Andy. Dang. Okay, well you didn't hear it from me! ;)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Haylino signing in

I guess it's true that manatees are da bomb!! Hayley kissed a manatee, and it turned into a prince, and they lived happily ever after in their billion dollar masion off the coast of Florida. Cha-Ching!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1 <3

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Then later, Amanda ate a bad fig, that put her under a spell. Only her worst enemy's kiss could wake her. So Austin bullied Voldemort into kissing amanda. Amanda woke up and promptly vomited those nasty voldemort cooties up. Then Voldemort killed Austin and Amanda. But it's ok, because Hayley killed Voldemort and used the Ressurrection Stone and her new manatee powers to revive Amanda. Sorry Austin. :(

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Later that very same day, Arlene was walking down the street with Sophia and Stefani, when this massive

THEN. ARLENE ATE POOP. I'M YOUR BOOGYMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! AHHHHHHHHHH STALKEREEEE!!!!!!!!

Love, Hayley

P.S PEACE OUT PEEPS

“Trying to make someone fall in love with you is about as pointless as trying to control who you fall in love with.”

Perhaps it was a bold move. Perhaps actions were misinterpreted as flirting. Perhaps something inside the mind said, “This is the only way.” But there was something in the minds of Berke and Kailey that urged them to pursuer their dreams of love.
It was a Friday afternoon just like any other. You should know things are never as they seem… Berke stood watching as Keala strode out of the performance arts building. He had just preformed the monologue of a lifetime and his aconfidence was high. Nonetheless, his nerves swarmed uncontrollably in the pit of stomach as Keala approached, her face alight and smiling.
“Hello Keala,” Berke greeted, his mouth turning upwards into a crooked grin.
“Hey Berke.”
“I was hoping to talk to you. Do you think-” he broke off to gesture towards the buildings back.
“Sure,” she smiled and followed Berke around until they were in private. “What’s up?”
“I… I really like you.” He took a deep breath and searched her face for a reaction. She turned her face downwards and her cheeks turned a rosy pink. She searched for words but came up empty-handed; she was speechless.
Who knows what was going through Berke’s mind then? Whether or not he had planned it, it happened.
“It’s okay.” His hands lifted up from his sides. In one swift movement, he cupped Keala’s face and kissed her…
As their lips parted, Keala broke away. “I have to go,” she stammered. And she was off.

~~~~~~

Well, word gets around. Berke gets to face the cold truth of rejection. Of Keala that is. Because Kailey is still plenty interested. Sure he turned her down. Over. And over. But Kailey’s friend is a worker of romance and she thinks Kailey and Berke would be cute together. She made all the arrangements and finally Berke agreed- the three of them would come over to his house for dinner. Of course, being the person she is, Kailey’s friend was sure to give the two plenty of alone time. (And at one point she even fell asleep! At 7 o’clock on his couch! But that’s beside the point; the point is that Kailey and Berke had plenty of alone time.)
“Told you I’d win!” Kailey was all smiles as her Mario Kart crossed the finish line seconds before Berke’s.
“You got lucky.”
“Me, lucky? Only if, maybe…” Berke just stared back until what Keala had felt earlier flew right back in his face. Kailey leaned in, closed her eyes, and planted her lips…
And there was nowhere for Berke to flee. Plan B?
“Hm. I’ll, uh, be back. I have to go the bathroom.”
Hahahahaha. Love bites. But hey, its not me!

Kiss and Tell

“How did it happen that their lips came together? How does it happen that birds sing, that snow melts, that the rose unfolds, that the dawn whitens behind the stark shapes of trees on the quivering summit of the hill? A kiss, and all was said.”

Seems so sweet doesn’t it? All mankind loves a good love story. This time- spotted together are Andy and Hunter, lip locked. Oh yeah, but doesn’t Hunter have a girlfriend? So maybe this story is a bit twisted…
Is it the new call of love? The two flirty friends stayed up all night texting. And it wasn’t too innocent. Eight inches, Hunter? Really?!? Who wants to know that? Truth is, maybe Andy does like him. But she’s still figuring it out and is unsure who she likes. She’s not about to give up her virginity to some guy she just met. You can stop asking if she’s on the pill.

~~~~~~

On a seperate note, Erika has officially stopped pining for bad boy Percy. That's better girly; maybe you'll find someone better for you this time! Meanwhile, Ariel can continue to waste time on him... hahaha. You're not going to win in that game honey. Oh- and he can tell you're a bitch. So not very interested!

Gotta Start Somewhere

Everyone knows reality shows and soap operas and too cliché. Life isn’t like that. But in West Linn, the ‘Upper East Side’ found in little Oregon, life is dramatic. The girls don’t cry all the time and nobody falls in love and suddenly life is happy endings. People don’t always sleep together. And when they do, it’s a lot more dramatic. And the ensuing battle is always nasty. Hey, all’s fair in love and war! *Lots of love* Your Twisted Teen Tabloid

“The problem is that as much as I can’t force you to love me, I can’t force myself to stop loving you.”

One thing no likes but everyone gets- Rejection. “I’m sorry, but I just don’t like you in that way.” Ouch. And there’s nothing you can do to force yourself to get over someone. Love bites.

At the top of the love chain is our seemingly happy couple Devon Carter and Loretta Pointer being trailed by the Paparazzi. The chemistry the two shared in Slumdog Millionaire was obvious, but are the two stars really in love with each other, or each other’s characters? Meanwhile Dev’s pal from India harbors a secret love. West Linn’s upperclassman Keala thinks the couple is based on “fantasy, a cute little story.” I don’t know Keala, Dev doesn’t seem interested in you… And crushing on Keala is actor Berke.
So first he asks her to see Watchman. “Sure!” was her answer. “But isn’t that rated R? Are your parents going?”
“Oh. Umm… maybe we could see a different movie.”
“Yeah, a bunch of us want to see Transformers. We could in a big group.”
“I was thinking it would just be the two of us.”
“Oh. I don’t think that’s a great idea. I’m just going to with friends.” Ouch. Sorry dude, but Keala thinks your creepy, haha.
If Berke wants, he can always ask Kailey. She’s been head over heals for months. Not interested? Poor Kailey, she knows it’s a lost cause but that doesn’t mean she’s any less in love with him. If she could move on maybe she would notice the way Ryan looks at her… who knew the famous actor would fall for a West Linn girl?
Meanwhile, she won’t admit it, but it appears that Laverna has feelings for Ryan. Her friends notice it. I notice it. Why else would her favorite movie be Benjamin Button?
At the end of the chain is Darrius. He turned Laverna around and now she’s friendly to guys. He showed her the light. But now she’s leaving and he’s still in love. Funny how that works?
The bad boy at campus rakes in lots of lovers, but most importantly we find both West Linn good girls, Erika and Ariel, under his spell. Don’t you know better girls? When you try to date a player, you can only get burned.
There are some long-time couples in West Linn who claim to be happy. But really guys? For two years Jay and Virginia have been together. But Jay’s started hanging out with other girls. And the tension starts arising. One of those girls really wishes the two would break up. Ever since Andy met Jay two years ago (when he first dated Virginia) she’s been infatuated with the taken guy. And Andy has no clue that her friend Rupert “Burt” likes her.
Then there’s our dirty couple “Dani and Hunter” who have also been dating for two years. They make what Jay and Virginia do look like first grade. But in a relationship so full of sex, is their any true love?
And in our third big couple, Robert Finnley just pronounced his love for girlfriend Tally. But oops! Tally’s not so smitten… awkward turtle!